When we speak about our experience, we are bringing in an element of objectivity to something which has been purely subjective. (Journaling also helps with this). This is invaluable in the process of assimilation.
But there are many other benefits from sharing with others in the right circumstances. With good, non-judgemental listening, trust is slowly built up which enables more and more opening up and disclosure, ie more clarity, understanding and assimilation. Also the example of others often frees us up, (“Oh, I’m not the only one who….”). And again, often, the points raised lead to an aspect of Dharma practice which is almost invariably relevant to all of us.
The development of this trust takes time and patience. Initially, we’re a bit like dogs meeting up, sniffing one another and taking in the ‘vibe’. And early on, it will take some courage to speak up. As mentioned above, being non-judgemental is important, although this does not mean suspending all discriminating wisdom. Kindness is obviously paramount. You may even be subject to being misunderstood or mis-judnged: it may then be necessary to forgive. All part of the process.
A fully functioning practice community is the Sangha at its best. People are relating to one another purely in terms of the Dharma. An element of verticality is necessary and will automatically be honoured. With someone’s progress, mudita automatically arises; whereas compassion will come naturally regarding challenge etc.
If you are an Order Member, you can connect with others looking to form an Insight Circle here
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